This time it's all about me!

I went to bed last night sad and woke up this morning pissed off. Why do people think they can pull one over on me? That's why I want to write for TV and film. I wanted to be a police officer here in the UK. I would have liked to work for Major crimes or homicide they call it in the US.

I use these skills to the fullest and can't understand why people get taken for granted due to money? My confession is they are not going to win that way. 

Why do people believe they can get away with things? But with the Internet it has been made very easy to make people believe you're someone you're not.

And that's the question? Why lie? Why not say who you are? It's this fake facade that people build up about their lifestyle, yet I don't understand why people do things because they're not happy?

At 57 years old I'm working but not what I would like to do, which is write for a living. Writing for TV, even maybe books. I wouldn't mind writing a film script but I think I want to write for TV because it's like chapters in a book.

What I don't understand is why? It's been my favorite question since I was a kid. I'm writing from my own pain and trying to believe that I wasn't just put on this earth to be treated badly. 

I'm divorced, I've never been in trouble, did jury service (most of my family have), I like to stay home and can't stand other people's drama. I don't have any friends, only my kids, (my 2 sons and my daughter in law). Go to work and come home. Working for what? My UK government doesn't understand that to make people want to work you need to give them an incentive. A better chance to build wealth. 

But people think some people are lazy and not worth anything because we have health issues that we didn't ask for. I'm sick of the mundane and the way the world is at the moment. Conflict, wars and the way the US is at the moment. 

What happened to truth and honesty? 

It's when people blame where they live, on what is happening in their life? But it's not the town or city's fault, it's people. 

Why do people worry so much about what other people are doing? I guess that's the difference with me? I want to understand why people need to strip down the feelings of others and treat people the way they do? Is it jealousy or just pure and simple hate? 

This is what keeps me up at night? Questions? 

Questions about life and understanding, it doesn't matter what others think. It's about making yourself happy and living the way you want to. If I can pass on any advice, don't let people stop you!

I think that was my problem, I let people tell me I was worth nothing by my family, ex husband and friends over the years. And I believed them? 

It doesn't matter how much money you have or education because I think people can see that at the moment due to someone in the White House. 

Don't let people dull your enthusiasm for life and all it can bring!

I'm doing this so I can move to a bigger home but the way it is set up for a divorced woman is to tell me I need someone to help me pay my bills. I want someone in my life to share things, love, laugh and be my best friend. Not just help financially. That's not a relationship!

It's time for me to stop worrying about what other people think and believe in me.

I worry because my brain doesn't work properly due to my hypothyroidism in concentration, brain fog and exhausted when I get home from work. Now it's time for me to stop worrying and start believing that I am intelligent about different topics because I read and research.

I am trying to build a better chance for me, I almost have my debt paid off for when I retire in 10 years. This time it's all about me!